Empty Nest Syndrome -- A Condition Ripe for Creativity
by Jayme H. Mansfield
Don’t get me wrong. I love my three sons. My husband James and I love them unconditionally and to the moon and back. But I gotta say, having an empty nest (at least for a while as several friends have warned) is pretty sweet.
Sure, there are the obvious reasons …
The dishwasher, washing machine and dryer have earned a well-deserved vacation from the daily grind. James and I back out of the driveway without performing back-flips with a twist to navigate around the full parking lot. The “no food and no shoes upstairs” rule is finally fulfilled and I am giddy over the orderliness of the house. My voice echos when I open the refrigerator and that’s okay. The clerks at Costco and Kings no longer know my name. The bank account … well, it’s still in rehab mode and may be for quite some time.
What’s not so obvious …
James and I enjoy early date mornings before we head to work. We sip coffee, talk about the day, pray, and listen to the quiet — it’s blissful. If inclined, we eat leftovers three nights in a row … at the kitchen table, around the fire pit, sitting on the couch (shhh! don’t tell the kids), or head to a restaurant with a table for two. We canoe for two, take a ride in the ‘63 VW Bug for two, and share a bucket of popcorn at the movies for two.
The best part is we’ve returned to dreaming aloud with each other — talking about the here and now, and most importantly, what our future might bring. We don’t know for sure, but we challenge one another to make it the best possible — unpack and shake the dust off past passions and goals, try new things and discover the untold stories of our lives—really anything, simple or complex, that’s on our minds.
Being an empty nester has allowed my mind and body to rest. I don’t mean in an inactive manner. Surely, I’m as busy and on the move as before, perhaps more so in some regards. Instead, it’s a peace, much like a soothing bath, where I have more moments to pause and reflect, allow an idea seedling to take root and flourish, and time to talk with God about things meaningful.
So, where’s the creativity?
Everywhere. My writing is infused with life and my art brings me joy. Each challenging? Each with trials? Of course, but my writing and art, when I often doubted if they would survive made it through the years of me being a mom of little ones, then a parent of teenagers, and now communing with young adults making their own way in the world.
Instead of this season of life being one of decline of creativity, I see it as emerging from the memories of the past, the intensity of the commitment, acceptance, and even forgiveness for one another in the present, and the enduring love our family needs to hold dearly in the future. Creativity, therefore, is in the living — day in, day out, before, now, and after—the whole stretch of this precious journey we call life.
As I write this, I am ONE. Alone at my computer (except for the dogs underfoot). Tonight, there will be a reuniting of TWO when my husband comes home from work. When Graham returns to the house after Thanksgiving from a multi-month, European mission trip, our home will be THREE. Then, when Adam graduates next spring from college, there’s a chance we will be FOUR. And even though newly married Ian and Kaylee are on their own and soon heading to Germany for military duty, in our hearts they are FIVE and SIX.
So, regardless of an empty nest, or few or many family members huddled around, I count my life full.
What’s happening in your nest? I’d love to know!
TWEETABLE
Instead of this season of life being one of decline of creativity, I see it as emerging from the memories of the past, the intensity of the commitment, acceptance, and even forgiveness for one another in the present, and the enduring love our family needs to hold dearly in the future. (Click to Tweet)
Loosening the reins and leaning into a creative life—that’s Jayme’s sweet spot as an author, artist, and educator. Speaking at book clubs and interest groups, teaching the writing craft, and guiding others in their artistic pursuits at her long-time art studio, Piggy Toes, is the icing on the cake. The transformative power of art and faith are common threads in her award-winning historical novels, Chasing the Butterfly and RUSH. Her upcoming contemporary love story, Seasoned, promises to deliver the same. Recently, RUSH won several awards, including the Gold Medal Illumination Award winner for Enduring Christian Fiction, Selah Finalist, Excellence in Editing, two prestigious Colorado Book of the Year Awards, and is a finalist for the Chanticleer Laramie Award for Excellence in Western Fiction. The book was named the 2019 Village Read in Colorado. Her bold floral abstractions and imaginative landscapes blend luscious color and playful texture—a testimony to what she refers to as “playing in the paint!”.
Jayme lives at the base of the Colorado Rocky Mountains where she and her husband have survived raising three hungry, hockey-playing sons.
Currently, two very needy Golden Retrievers run the roost.
Visit www.jaymehmansfield.com for books, art, and creative inspiration.